Friday, August 24, 2012

fancy a bit of Italian shopping?

As I have mentioned  already at the end of next week I am off to the home land for a bit of well deserved holiday and also for some crucial hospital tests to find out if my cancer is back or not. I am REALLY scared about that.

Anyway! I will be taking a good look around a few beauty shops and department store so if there is anything from an Italian brand you would like me to get you, or do a beauty/nail/fashion swap, then get in touch. You can leave me a comment here, send me an e-mail or get me on Twitter.

Here are a few beauty brands websites you might wanna take a look at:
KIKO Cosmetics
Layla Cosmetics
DEBORAH Milano  -their English section doesn't really show the full nail polishes/products list so I would suggest you check it here in the Italian section, it's fairly easy to understand-
I will also be encountering the full Essence and Catrice counters in hope that mainland continent has some products that never made it to Ireland or the UK in the last few months so, if there's anything you were looking out for but never found, let me know. I know I have quite a few!

I hope everyone has a nice week-end.


Monday, August 20, 2012

ASOS nail polish mini haul

Last week I placed a little nail  polishes order with ASOS and I was overly excited this morning when I got it. If Irish post actually delivered  on a Saturday, it would have been with me since.
Here is what I ordered

 Barry M Acid Yellow #229: for the past 3 years I have been looking for a super bright yellow that would work with my skin tone and so far had been failing. This will hopefully work with its slight acid under tone. I know my skin tone doesn't exactly suit warm toned polishes so here's hoping. I already have a couple of nail foils in mind that would make an amazing look teamed up with this.

Barry M Magnetic Blue: this is part  of the new Magnetic Nail Effects line. I had my eyes on the blue one since I saw the first press releases, I just could not resist that star effect. My usual luck has had it that my Boots never had a single bottle left whenever I went looking for it.  Anything that gives my nails a nail art effect without me taking my eyes out of my sockets, is right up my street!

Models Own Tropical Sun: this is part of their Beetlejuice collection. I missed out on the collection when it first came out as every time I tried to order from any web site, the whole line was sold out. I am aware that this is a complete warm colour with a warm under tone but the colour just screamed at me!  This is going to look absolutely AMAZING in the Italian sunshine on my holidays!
Models Own Indian Ocean: this too from the Beetlejuice. I have been almost obsessed with getting my hands on this little wonder and I have to admit out of this mini haul, this was the polish I was looking forward to the most. I was already looking forward to wearing it on my holiday.
However that MIGHT not happen. At first glance I thought the label had not been applied properly and had some air pockets under it, but on closer inspection my heart sank: the whole bottle is smashed to pieces! Had it been just one crack I wouldn't have cared, THAT is how much  I wanted this polish! But as soon as I remove the outer plastic wrapping, I am sure the whole bottle would just  shatter to pieces. I am pondering just ordering another bottle straight away before ASOS get back to me about it, just to make sure I do have this with me when I leave next week.

I also ordered a Rimmel matte top coat as my ELF one has gone bad and has been thrown away.

Any of these caught your eyes too?

*UPDATE*: the AMAZING customer service at ASOS have got back to me since this was typed up. I should have a new Indian Ocean soon, hopefully before I leave next week.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

FOTD: feature in Irish newspaper

Last week I gave an interview for a feature in an Irish newspaper which will be published soon, and Monday I had my photo taken for it. It will be about my experience with cancer and my condition.
I will post a scan of the article when it's out.
In the meantime, here's the look I came up with for the shoot


Catrice Skin Finish powder, 010 transparent
Rimmel sun shimmer bronzing powder in Light matte
Accessorise With Love Golden Sand baked bronzer (highlighter)
Collection 2000 Lasting Perfection concealer in 1 Fair

Essence get BIG! waterproof mascara
Essence long-lasting eye pencil, 04 hot chocolate
Avon supershock gel eyeliner
Essence, 01 South Beach palette
Sleek iDivine The Original Palette

Revlon lip butter in Berry Smoothie
Revlon Superlustrous lipgloss in Pink Afterglow

Have a nice day,

Monday, August 6, 2012

A big hole

I have had the urge to write this post for a while, but something has always stopped me.
Maybe shame. Maybe fear of nobody caring. Maybe fear of appearing weak.
But if I am not free to express myself on my blog, where else can I do it?!
Then a few days ago a friend wrote this amazingly moving piece. And it did move me, it moved me to tears.
I'm not sure jealousy is the right word for what it generated in me, it just made me face the emotional void I've been experiencing for years now, so much more so since I moved.
I am extremely envious of people that have that one special person in their life, that person you can call your Best Friend.
I have to be honest, thankfully I am no stranger to the concept.

For the 5 years of primary school I had a best friend, and although it wasn't the type of deep, meaningful friendship adult life brings to you, I was very grateful to share so many experiences with her. Unfortunately our parents chose 2 different middle schools for us, and I guess it showed me that she wasn't in this friendship as much as I was.
I tried to make an effort to still have her in my life, but I guess she just didn't want me in hers anymore.

At 14 during the summer between secondary and high school, I struck up a friendship that stunned me. I met an 18 year old guy through mutual friends and becoming best friends just rocked me to the core. I couldn't believe that I'd found that type of deep, strong friendship I only saw in movies or read about in books.
Although I was having a horrible time in school, with my family (as per usual) and generally in life, he was always there, he was the constant ray of sun light. Still to this day I wonder how did I get so lucky, I always felt like I didn't deserve our friendship, he was too great to be human.
When I was 16 the general order of the Universe was "restored" and he was taken away from me, from us, in the most horrible of ways.
It was Champions League night and we had organised a get together, as we always did. Him and his brother hopped into their car and after a stop for snacks, they started making their way to mine.
They never made it to my house. I started panicking when they wouldn't answer their phones. I had a panic attack when at the 50th phone call at midnight their mother picked up his phone, and told me they had been in a horrible car crash. A drunk driver had run a red light and plunged straight  into their car, straight into the driver's side. My friend was driving.
His brother had fractured legs and a fractured shoulder. My friend was in a coma. He was air lifted to another city hospital which specialises in that type of injuries. He was there for 3 days in a coma, never once woke up, I was never allowed to go see him as I wasn't family. He never came back alive from there.
Despite his family begging me not to, I blamed myself, and still do, for his death. I didn't drive the car that crashed into hiss, but had they not be driving to mine, he'd still be here filling people's lives with joy.
I never got over the loss, and I probably never will.
Since then I haven't had that type of connection with anyone, and it deeply pains me.
I hit a particularly bad patch during the period I had cancer and the surgeries. My parents and brother treated me horribly and I wasn't allowed to tell anyone else in my family, I couldn't upset anyone. Still to this day only one other member of my family knows about it, because I told him years later.
I felt so alone, I was scared I was going to die, I was mad because I did NOT deserve it, life had treated me bad enough until then.

During the last year of high school I found myself slowly getting close to the girl from primary again. although I always suspected she wasn't really capable of a deep personal connection with anyone. However I thought that maybe it was just me and was absolutely over the moon when she told me she had applied for the same university as me. And not just that, she had applied for many of the same courses as me. That would have meant someone to commute with every single day, someone to share lunch breaks with, someone to just generally share the whole amazing experience with. I was particularly delighted as it was especially stressful for me in regards to my disability. But that's for, perhaps, a future post.
One day that I knew was going to be peculiarly full for us, I noticed that she wasn't on the coach; for a few days I texted her and tried calling her, but with no answer. I even tried to call her house but she'd ask her parents to tell me she wasn't home. A few weeks later I was talking to a mutual friend who knew what had happened and told me that her mother had run into our friend's and had found out what was going on: my friend had changed her mind about her choice of university and didn't even bother about telling me. I tried to get in touch asking for an explanation, but never heard back from her. I guess I was right all those years, maybe she did not really want me in her life.

Since then I have endured even more horrible experiences, on my own, without resorting to any type of addiction. I've just been sucking it up and got on with it. because that's just the way the world expect me to be, I'm expected to just be my own person and not ever have to lean on anyone.

I just needed to voice this void.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Bank holiday Saturday shopping

I am generally not a lover of crowded shops so yesterday I took advantage of our bank holiday weekend and the fact that town emptied, to have a little "me" time.

These babies are currently €15 in Dunnes Stores, and although I didn't purchase them, they are SERIOUSLY tempting me!
Essence, 01 South Beach from the Sun Club collection.
I have to say I LOVE this palette! The 4 shades on the right half are the perfect smokey eye shades, the blues/greens are gorgeous and that burned ocre shade will bring out the colour of my eyes really well. Plus it's dead handy for travelling and it's hand bag friendly.

Essence, kajal pencil in 19 All I want.
Even if the nature of this is to be an eye liner, it's actually the PERFECT shade for my brows when I want a more natural, laid back look.

These 2 dresses are from Dorothy Perkins and were  €25 each. Yes, I did take photos in the changing room, but trust me, this is far better lighting in my apartment. The second one is "cheat" lace, it's actually just printed.

Hip hip hooray for bank holiday empty shops!

NOTD: summer power

As Summer doesn't seem to be of the idea of visiting Ireland any time soon, I decided to grab it and just impose it on my nails.

This is simply a flowery nail foil with Color Club in French Tip to emphasize the colours of the flowers.
That's it, THAT simple.

Ya like?